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Switzerland Got Funky

Well, over In the Habsburg Empire
Old Leopold was pissed
The Swiss had just sacked Einsiedeln
And Lee slammed down his fist
“Those doggone little cheese-eaters
Have gone too far this time!”
So he gathered up his army
And he marched them to the Rhine

Up in a mountain village
Morgarten was it’s name
Leopold’s army was eating its lunch
When down from the hills there came
A horde of angry peasants
Waving halberds in the air
Leopold, he just said, “Aw shucks,
I guess this is where

Switzerland gets funky” (3 times)

Ever since that fateful day
Nothing much transpired
The Swiss became a laughingstock
So dull and uninspired
But the Alpine shepherd’s got a secret dream
To be a Greek or a Turk
He’s tired of neutrality
And machines that always work

So’s the businessman in Basel
And the diplomat in Bern
The skiers up at St. Moritz
And the Catholics in Luzern
The bankers all are gossiping
About their clients’ crimes
The chocolate bars are melting
And the trains don't run on time,

Switzerland got funky
Got down like a funky junkie
Switzerland got funky

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